UN-Grounded

I'm no longer grounded. There isn't anything to hold me in-check. I've got to find a way to "control" the things I do.

I'm an educated, fairly intelligent, otherwise responsible adult. Yet, I find myself drinking too much, hanging at the Saloon too much, spending too much, not eating, going off on the dogs.. and there isn't anyone to stop me.

I'd like to get angry enough to take every glass item I own outside and smash them against the concrete. I don't really know why I don't, except that the anger just leads to more hurt and pain, so I avoid anger. I also avoid too much laughter.

Yes, maintaining the wall around everything is about all I can control.